Acts 9:1-19a II; Paul's Conversion--Called to Suffer

The second part of the narrative makes us almost come to a halt in our reading in order to try to appreciate all the things that are happening here. Like the light that shone around the shepherds watching their flock by night, like the light suffusing a Rembrandt painting of the holy family, so a light shone around Saul and his companion/s on the way to Damascus. With his penchant for "visual" details, Luke tells us that Saul's traveling companions heard a voice but saw no one (v. 7). He doesn't mention if they saw a light, but presumably they did. Actually his narrative never mentions whether Saul saw anyone, so his remark isn't as clear as he could be. Then there are the words of Jesus: "I am Jesus whom you are persecuting" (v. 5). Saul's laying waste to the early Chrsitian communities is tantamount to persecuting Christ. Jesus so closely identifies with his church that a hurt to the latter is suffered by Jesus. Like the figure moving among the lampstands of Revelation 1, so Jesus' words here indicate that the Church is not simply Christ's instrument in the world but is the very "skin" of Christ. How does that sound, the Church as the cutis (Lat. for "skin") of Christ?

Third, we recognize how this experience shaped Paul's piety and language througout his career. Luke has Paul refer to this conversion story in his defense speeches in Acts 22 and 26, but even more, Paul integrates the intensity of this experience into his language in I Cor 15; II Cor 5; Gal 1; Phil 3 and other passages. Clearly, he could never get "over" or "past" this experience; rather it became the root metaphor of his understanding of the Christian life. Listen to the beauty of II Cor 4:6,

"For it is the God who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,' who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ."

A more powerful, insightful, and theologically rich description of salvation I have never seen. And it is all derived from Paul's reflection on his "Damascus Road" experience.

III. Called--To Suffer (10-19a)

The flow of this part of the passage again is "classic" Luke. The divine appears to Ananias in a dream, there is a sort of negotation between God and Ananias, Ananias protests, then he complies, and then he learns the mystery of what God is about to do. The structure of this story is reminiscent of Luke's description of the angel Gabriel's appearance to Mary in Luke 1. Each of these points could receive longer treatment, but I will focus on the mystery or message of what God is intending to do with Saul/Paul. The text says:

"Go, for he is an instrument whom I have chosen to bring my name before Gentiles and kinds and before the people of Israel; I myself will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name" (9:15-16).

Note that Ananias is told about Saul's mission before Saul seems to be aware of it! It is like someone opening your mail when in the envelope is the crucial information regarding a job or some other significant issue in your life.

And what is that message? A message of suffering. Realize that God says this to Ananias but that when Ananias speaks to Saul, he doesn't tell Saul about the suffering he will face. Rather, all he says is that the Holy Spirit sent him so that Saul would regain his sight and receive the Holy Spirit (v. 17). It looks as if Saul will have to discover the suffering on his own. Indeed, he did. All you have to do is to read the laments of II Cor 10-13 or anything in the letter to the Galatians to realize that suffering was to be a central experience to Paul in his life of discipleship.

Conclusion

Should we expect it to be any different for us today? You don't have to be that alert a reader in our culture to realize that there is a species (or maybe it is a genus) of the Religious Right which spends its time complaining about how religious freedom is restricted in America and how much they are suffering as a result of these restrictions in "Christian" America. The narrative today makes me want to respond to these complaints in two ways: (1) to wonder if, in fact, these folk know what it means to suffer for faith (indeed, it may be more of a political ploy than genuine suffering that is at the heart of their complaint) and (2) to urge them to take on some suffering, since that concept and reality is at the heart of not only Paul's ministry but of Christ's identity.

Why is suffering basic to genuine faith? I think for two reasons: because anyone who vigorously questions the religious or political status quo will incur the wrath of those who think they have the truth and must suppress what you say or do; and because suffering is basically God's middle name. At the heart of the universe rests not so much a heart of love--which is what all the popular preachers want us to believe--but a heart that grieves. So, those who suffer for faith learn to understand that grieving heart at the center of reality.

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